Parashat Terumah - More Doesn’t Always Mean Better: Finding Joy in What You Have

Adar 1, 5785 - Saturday, March 1, 2025

The Parable of the Farmer and His Field

Imagine a man who inherits a piece of land. Excited for his future, he plants wheat seeds and waters them just as needed. With God’s help, he is blessed with success—the field produces a beautiful, bountiful harvest. The following year, as planting season approaches, he reflects on his past experience and makes a calculation: If I received such an abundant harvest by watering the field this much, surely if I double the amount of water, I’ll yield twice as much wheat!

So he spares no effort, flooding the field with water, far beyond what he had done the year before. But instead of doubling his harvest, disaster strikes. The excess water causes the seeds to rot. Not only does his field fail to produce twice the wheat, it produces nothing at all.

Only then does he realize his mistake. A field needs the right amount of water. no more, no less. More water doesn’t mean more wheat. Sometimes, too much of a good thing is not a blessing, but a curse.

And so it is in life. Many people believe that if only they had more, more money, more success, more possessions then they would be happier. But, just like the farmer who drowned his own field, they fail to see that abundance without balance does not always lead to prosperity. In fact, it can lead to ruin.

Adar – Learning About Happiness

Our sages teach us that when the month of Adar begins, we increase in simcha, we increase in joy. But what does that mean? Does it mean we just wake up and force ourselves to be happy? What if we don’t feel happy? What if we look around and say, "I don’t have good fortune! How can I possibly increase my joy?"

To understand this, we first have to recognize where sadness comes from. A person who feels lacking is naturally sad. When someone believes they deserve more, more wealth, more comfort, more status, and they don’t have it, it eats away at them. They feel cheated. Their entire outlook darkens.

But the Torah gives us a different definition of wealth: "Who is rich? One who is happy with his lot."2

True happiness isn’t about having more. It’s about appreciating what you already have. The work of Adar, the secret to increasing joy, is not about chasing more. It's about learning to be content, to realize that whatever portion you have in life is exactly what is meant for you. It is perfect as it is.

And modern psychology proves this to be true.

The Lottery Winners vs. Paraplegics Study

In 1978, psychologists Philip Brickman, Dan Coates, and Ronnie Janoff-Bulman conducted a fascinating study that illustrates this concept.

They compared two very different groups of people:

• Lottery winners—who had suddenly gained enormous wealth.

• Paraplegics—who had recently suffered devastating accidents leading to paralysis.

The researchers wanted to understand how these major life events impacted long-term happiness. At first, the lottery winners experienced a huge spike in happiness—after all, they had just become rich! But over time, their happiness returned to its baseline level. Some even reported feeling less joy in everyday life than before. Meanwhile, the paraplegics suffered an initial drop in happiness, but something surprising happened: as time passed, their happiness also returned to baseline. Many of them adapted to their new reality and even found meaning in life despite their circumstances.

What does this tell us? That happiness isn’t about what happens to us—it’s about what happens inside us. External circumstances, whether wealth or hardship, do not determine long-term happiness. Perspective does.

This is precisely what the Torah has been teaching for thousands of years: "Who is rich? The one who is happy with his lot!"

The Morning Life Lesson from Coffee

And to reinforce this lesson, we have a simple, everyday reminder—the first thing we do in the morning. It is customary to begin the day by reciting the blessing “Shehakol Nihiyah Bidvaro", “that everything came into being by His word", over a cup of coffee.

Think about coffee for a moment. It is made from boiling hot water and cold milk, from sweet sugar and naturally bitter coffee. It is a perfect blend of contrasts.

And that is life. Sometimes life is warm, sometimes it is cold. Sometimes it is sweet, sometimes it is bitter. But every morning, as we sip our coffee and recite that blessing, we are reminded: It is all by the word of God. Everything in life, the good and the bad, the easy and the hard, the things we understand and the things we don’t, is perfectly designed for us.

So as we enter Adar, let us take this lesson to heart. Let’s stop searching for happiness out there and start cultivating it inside. Because true joy comes not from having more, but from appreciating what we already have. And that is the greatest wealth of all.

Shabbat Shalom! 

1 Adapted from Be’er Haparasha - Terumah 5785

2 Avot 4,1